If you are feeling like your parenting game could use a spring cleaning, learning some Positive Discipline parenting tools can be just the thing you need to reduce stress & increase your happiness & connection within your family. “A child needs encouragement like a plant needs water.” - Rudolf Dreikurs I’ve talked about the importance of building resilience skills in your children. It’s ...
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Asking vs. Telling Skill
Let’s start with the challenge, “My Child Doesn’t Listen”. When a parent says my child doesn’t listen, they really mean they won’t obey. Wouldn’t you rather have cooperation and motivation from within than obedience from fear, or from a child who is learning to be an approval junkie? When children don’t listen it could be that you are lecturing or making demands that create classic power ...
Technology Limits in your Home
A few basic parenting ground rules to establish TECHNOLOGY HARMONY at home. We’ve all read endless articles about technology, safety and its negative impact. Keep having conversations with your children about it. Ask them direct questions about their usage and never be afraid to adjust the rules in your home. Many parents complain about their child’s endless hours on their phones, yet have ...
The Good Enough Parent
You want more than anything to be a great parent, be available and to not have “shortcomings”. The good news is that kids just need you to be a “GOOD ENOUGH PARENT”. You don’t have to be perfect for your child to be happy and healthy. You can make mistakes and have bad days. Just keep trying. Success might require many tries and even the best strategies might have to be revised. Give yourself the ...
Importance of Teaching our Kids Cooperation
Your child is watching and listening to you. How do you interact with family members, friends and even strangers? How do you speak to people? How do you support them? How do you build connections? When your kids are younger and you see them cooperating, point it out and say “I like the way you’re playing well with your sister.” You can use the word, COOPERATION, but explain it as it’s a way ...
Helping Your Kids Navigate Through Anxiety
When our kids get anxious, of course we want to make them feel better. But, by protecting them from the things that upset them, anxiety may worsen. The best way to help our kids overcome anxiety is to teach them to deal with the anxiety as it comes up. With practice and time, they will feel less anxious in these events. 1. The Goal Isn’t to Eliminate Anxiety, but to Help a Child Manage It. - We ...
Button Pushing 101
We all have reactions & reactivity. It’s recognizing what we are feeling in the moment & trying to break the cycle of our past familial interactions. The goal is to see the patterns and learn to change them. Practice Rupture & Repair - we have an argument. How do we repair afterward? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled. I’ll try to listen better next time. I tell all my clients, ...
10 Tips to Overcome Parenting Challenges:
Discuss differences behind closed doors - your children don’t need to hear you arguing (but it’s certainly Ok for them to hear it on occasion if they see the apologies & some resolution). It’s ok to not have a decision on the spot. You can say that mom and dad would like to talk about it and we will give you an answer later. This way you get to discuss how you will handle an issue. Agree on ...
The Importance of a Quality Connection with your Child
Summer is an ideal time to hone in on your CONNECTION with your children. I've written about this before, but in helping clients who are going through challenges with their kids, I keep coming back to the foundational words of Daniel Siegel, " For a child or an adult, it's extremely powerful to hear someone say, "I get you. I understand. I see why you feel this way." This kind of empathy ...
My Soon to be Empty Nest
Does an Empty Nest Signify the End of our Parenting Influence? I’ve talked before about my daughter leaving for college this fall and my nervous anticipation about her being gone. But, as I get closer to the date of departure, I am embracing it more from a vantage point of excitement for her rather than from my own feelings of loss. OK, maybe let’s call it “a tempered excitement???!!!” She ...
